Helping a stranger

Recently I was waiting at a bus stop to go to the near-by market. My eyes caught a person who was also waiting there. Let us call him Ram. He was wearing a white shirt, and dark grey trousers. His facial expression told that he was not very happy at the moment. He looked worried, and he did not care to settle his ruffled hair. As I was watching him, a Santro arrived at the bus-stop, and stopped a few feet ahead of the man. I could not see who the people inside the car were as the dark glasses were rolled up. After few moments, the car door opened and a passenger handed some money to Ram. From what I could make out, they were few notes of Rs.10 denomination. Ram put them in his pocket, and the car went away. Ram now looked at me, and saw me watching him. He came to me, and we had a conversation. I do not know the language that he spoke, but still could make out what he was saying.

He told that he was a student from a near-by town, and had come to attend a job-interview. Somebody picked his pocket and he lost entire money that he was carrying. He had no means to go back home. He only had few rupees with him now that he got few moments ago in front of my eyes. He asked can I help him.

Now I have had more than one encounter like this in the city of Bangalore. Almost every time I have given away some amount, max up to Rs. 100. But I was never convinced that my money was actually being put to the use for which it was meant. So, on this occasion, I declined help to Ram.

Ram walked away, moving his limbs in utter display of frustration. I watched him, wondering whether should I call him back and give him some money. At that moment, the bus for which I was waiting arrived, and I boarded it. As the bus moved, I could still see Ram, his worried face, unsure of the near future. May be I should have helped him.

After this incident I did notice one thing. Even after declining help to Ram, I was not convinced whether I had done the right thing.

Our mentality

Last week I was traveling by a local bus to reach my office. Our bus reached a cross-section of the roads when it had to stop due to traffic. It was a bit unusual delay in the bus to proceed further, as that junction is not known for any traffic jams whatsoever. Then, one vehicle in front of our bus took a u-turn and went back. Seeing this happening, many passengers in our bus thought there might be some accident that was the root cause of the trouble. Many of them stood up from their seats and craned their necks outside the bus windows to know actually what has happened. It was evident from the reactions on their faces that they were not able to se anything wrong on the road ahead, which was jammed by many vehicles in front of us. After a minute or so, our bus started moving, and it drew nearer to the point where the accident was supposed to have taken place. Almost all passengers were now peeking out of the windows to get a glimpse of the accident. And as we crossed the spot, there was no accident. The jam was caused by a huge lorry that had taken a wrong turn, and now its driver was trying to reverse it so that he can take it into the right direction.

I was happy that that there was no unfortunate incident that had happened on the road. But the disappointment on the faces of fellow-passengers drew my attention. People were disappointed that they did not get any subject on which they could gossip later with their friends.

I wonder as to what has happened to our mentality. Are we so irrational that we care more for something that will make us center of attraction when we narrate the accident that we saw on the road, than thanking God that there has been no untoward happening around us. Lately it has been a matter of discussion in the philosophical circles as to why people are more attracted towards bad news in a newspaper than good news. My observation is only another proof as to that this is indeed happening.

You may ask, how will change? Or, will it change after all? I have faith that this mentality of ours will change. I do not know how long will it take. I wish I knew how this change will take place.

Lending money to a stranger

Few days ago, as I was going to my colleagues house for a dinner invitation I was stopped by a man riding a scooter. He took out his helmet, and asked me can I help him. I wondered what can I do. Here is the rest of the conversation.

"Hey, I just need to buy some petrol from the nearest petrol-bunk. Can you help me?"
"Yes, I know the nearest petrol-bunk."
"No man. Can you help me to buy this much petrol?" he said indicating with his hand as if he wanted just a pinch of petrol.

I thought for a moment. I had little over Rs.200 (US$ 4) with me. In India, 1 litre of petrol costs Rs. 50. How much could I help him? Still I climbed on the pillion seat.

It was just 5 minutes ride. On the way I learnt that he had been riding on a busy road, when suddenly police stopped him and asked him for his papers. He did not have them on his hand, and had to pay quite a good sum as fine. Now he did not have even a penny, and will not be able to reach his home with the amount of petrol left in his scooter.

As we came to the petrol bunk, I handed him a Rs.100 note. He asked for more, and then I showed him my wallet containing the other one. Before taking leave he took my phone number, telling that he will call me the next day and pay me back. I trusted him and did not take his contact details.

I am still waiting for his call after 2 weeks.

I always try to learn from the incidents that happen around me. But I wonder what I had to learn from this one. Should I take the contact address from those whom I lend money from now on, however small sum it may be? Or should I stop trusting starngers with money?

A friend v/s a colleague

A friend in need is a friend indeed. Each one of us need a friend who is there to help us in the times of need. Those of us who have a friend are really fortunate. And others who do not have, are in search of one.

Ever thought that your colleagues can be your friend? Let us take a scenario. Your friend joins the same organization for which you are currently working. He is now your colleague. You will definitely consider yourself lucky. He is going to be by your side through-out the day, may be even outside the office hours.

Now let's take the other scenario, where you are looking for a friend amongst your colleagues. This is not a very comfortable situation. Finding a friend is not a piece of cake.

If you are trying to figure out as to who among your colleagues can be good friend of yours, try to gauze how much he or she is interested in you. The following points can help:

Friend: Is interested in your life & career apart from his own.

Colleague: Is interested in you if you are helpful in his life & career.

Friend: Will share your workload if you need it, irrespective of his roles and responsibilities.

Colleague: Will ask you to share his workload.

Friend: Will wait for you so that you can join him for lunch.

Colleague: Will tell you that he had to miss his lunch to gain your sympathy.

Friend: Will share all the information with you irrespective of what you share with him.

Colleague: Will share information with you if can extract something more from you.

Friend: Will even wait for you after the office-hours so that both of you can leave together from the office.

Colleague: Not concerned as to when you leave the office.

Friend: If you are not well, he will be there to care for you in office, and outside the office.

Colleague: If you are not well, he will ensure that he does not get your workload.

If any of your colleagues satisfies most of the points mentioned above, then he/she is planning to be your friend.

Remember that the best way to make a friend is to be one. Look back at yourself & introspect whether you can be a friend to somebody or not.

If we don't focus...

When we are about to undertake a new task or new project, we need to ensure we don't lose our focus till the completion of the task. The sole purpose for which the task has been undertaken should not be forgotten, and all the activities that are done to complete the task should not conflict with the final purpose.

If the focus is lost, then the entire project goes haywire, and the end-product is something that nobody could have thought of during the initial stages.

Below is an example of one such project. The board displayed in the picture is meant to inform the travelers about a bridge ahead. This information appears at the very bottom of the board. Looks like the focus was somewhere else.

Quotes worth citing #3

Love is one of the most wonderful creation of God. It makes us happy at times & sad at other times, depending upon the situation. Love involves sacrifice too. A lover can give his life for the sake of his love. Without giving, love cannot exist.

This is the essence of the following quote that I found last week:

"You can give without loving. But you cannot love without giving."

How to handle a person who complains continously

Many of us would have come across people who keep complaining about everything in this world. It is a very dificult situation for us as we may not agree with them but still we have to listen to all they have to tell us. How do we get out of such a situation?

I found the answer on the link given below. It says that the best way is to empathise with them. That is what they are looking for. Your empathy will give them a lot of self-satisfaction & assurance. For details, follow the following link.

How to handle chronic complainers

An Amazing Ad

Marketing a product requires an optimum mix of 4 Ps: product, price, promotion, & place. Most important definitely is the product. And the other three are equally important if you need to market the product well.

Look at the image below.

Can you tell what the following ad is for? This ad is for a special promo from the local bus transport service. The traveler can go around the entire city by paying only Rs. 2 ($0.05) with some conditions attached. Right?

In fact, this is an ad for a local daily in Bangalore, India. Think about the placement of this ad. Do you find it misleading………?

Why secret salaries are a bad idea

In most of the organizations the salary of the employees is kept a secret. This is done so that the management can avoid justifying the salary difference to the "lesser-paid" employees when compared to the "well-paid" employees. Many of accept it as a norm.

I happen to come to the following article, and it makes us aware as to what benefits a company can harvest if the salaries of the employees are made public. The followong are the highlights.

Making salaries public (inside the company of course) has some major advantages:

1. Salaries will become more fair. The system gets a chance to adjust itself.
2. It will be easier to retain the best employees because they’re more likely to feel they’re getting a fair salary.
3. The pressure is on the people with the high salaries to earn their keep. Everybody has to pull their weight - the higher the salary, the larger the weight.

Visit the link below to read the entire article.


Why secret salaries are a baaaaaad idea

Launch of Suggestica

It is said that books are the best friend of a man. They are one of the best source of guidance to all aspects of life. Today heralds the day for the launch of a website that has a very good collection of books written by various experts on many subjects. Please visit Suggestica (Beta version) and browse through the huge collection & enjoy...

Write down your goals

Last week there was some problem with the centralized server in our office due to which the server date was displaying a past date. Since all of us login into the server through our local machine, our system threw up a error message informing us that the local system time & the server time is different. When we opened Outlook to check our mails, the view was very different. Outlook displayed mails categorized as "Tomorrow's Mails", "Next Week's Mails", & "Next Month's mail". It was so funny to imagine that we know what mails we are going to get in the future & what action we will be taking against them. How nice it will be if we get to know what will happen in future...!

Recently I was reading the book Goals by Brain Tracy. The entire essence of the book can be summarized in just one sentence: "You are responsible for your life". Another important lesson that the book teaches is that we should all have written goals. This works miracles. A goal that is written acts as a manager who is has given you deadline but leaves you on your own to decide how to accomplish it. So even though you may be busy in your daily activities, you will always have a nagging feel at the back of your mind that will remind you of the goal that YOU have set yourself. This feel make you undertake actions that will direct you towards the goal. And finally the goal will be achieved by you. There are always some pre-requisites for success of this kind. The goal should have a deadline. It is said that a plan is a goal with a deadline. With the deadline, our goal becomes a plan to succeed.

The deadline is similar to a mail that is labeled as "Next year's Mail"...

Quotes worth citing #2

We all would have heard that there is nothing bad in this world; every thing happens for our own good. But when the testing times come, we generally tend to forget this. We never realize that same situation can make us laugh at one time & cry at another time.

Remember a past situation that occured at least 5 years ago when you were shedding tears due to some reason. When you think about it today, mostly you will laugh at yourself wondering how could you cry for such a 'silly' reason. Now think of another situation where you were having a lot of fun with your best friend(s). This also should have occured 5 years or earlier. You will feel sad immediately, especially if you are not in touch with those friends. You will ask yourself as to where have those beautiful days gone? Two different situations, make us laugh & cry at different times. Isn't it?

My colleague Soumya send me the following quote that just explains everything above...

We always know that looking back on our tears would make us laugh. But we never know that looking back on the moments we laughed together would make us cry.

To-do list in Firefox Sidebar

Many times we miss out very obvious things and try to solve a problem using a method that is more cumbersome & time-taking. I have been searchig for a tool that will keep my To-do list always on my desktop. One way is to put them in Outlook Tasks list. Bu then one has to open it again & again to see the to-do's. Other way is to use scrap-pad of Google desktop. But in our company we are not allowed to install any software at all. :-(

I just came across the following article at erica's joys :)

This has solved my problem as most of the time I have to work with browser applications. Thank you Erica.

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Whenever I'm on my Mac or Linux box, I miss the functionality of my Google Desktop Sidebar. I like being able to have a to do list, my Google calendar, and other various useful things right at my fingertips. I got to thinking about the Firefox Sidebar yesterday and how I could use that along with my Personalized Google page to make a sidebar I could use on any OS. Once I did it, I couldn't believe I hadn't done it sooner. I'm quite sure some enterprising person has already done this and it was posted on Lifehacker ages ago, but once again, its new to me. Anywho, here's what I did.

1) If you don't already have it, install Firefox.
2) Using Firefox, browse to http://www.google.com/ig
3) Line up all your Gadgets on the left, putting the ones you'll use most at the top.
4) Once you've got everything arranged, bookmark that page and give it the name Google IG.
5) Open Bookmarks in the toolbar and select Manage Bookmarks.
6) Highlight the Google IG bookmark and click on the Properties button.
7) In the Properties dialog check the box next to "Load this bookmark in the sidebar" then click OK.
8) Double click the Google IG bookmark and it should load in the sidebar.
9) Close the Bookmarks Manager and enjoy. :)

To make your Google IG book more accessible, your can put it in your Bookmarks Toolbar.

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Giving tip to shopkeeper

Few weeks ago I had an opportunity to eat at an outlet manned by a single person. I got into conversation with him, and learned that he was the sole owner of the shop. He will prepare the eatables in the morning and open his shop in the afternoon. His native place happened to be near my native place & that allowed me to ask him some other general questions regarding his family and life-style. At the end, I perceived him to be an honest person doing an honest job. When the time came to make the payment, I was overcome by a temptation. I wanted to see whether this man would accept extra money as a favour or not. I handed him 33% more money than I was supposed to pay. He promptly took it.

I was left waiting for the words such as,"I will only take what is due to me…" or something like that. I discussed this with my friend. He told that since the trend in every restaurant is to give tip to the waiter, the same criteria apply here. The extra money that I paid is like tip for him.

I had asked that person's daily income. He earns more than me….

Quotes worth citing

I had not been well last week following a bout of food-poisioning. This week I joined my office back again, and came across the following quote:

"Never frown, because you never know who may be falling in love with your smile."

I am smiling today...

Managing Change in Workplace #3

If there is a change happening in an organization, it is natural for the employees to feel unsafe & insecure. We all resist the unknown. As an employee, the following are the things that I would recommend to do when you see the change taking place in your organization.

• Believe in the management. They are doing this for the good of the company. Remember they are also stakeholders in the company as you are.
• Look at change from your manager's perspective. Does it help him in organizing his people and tasks better? Is he not becoming more efficient & effective?
• Find out the new tasks for you that you may have to do in your new role. Also contemplate as to how the change helps you to grow as a person (& not just career).
• Don’t draw conclusions on the first day itself. Wait till the system stabilizes after the change. The normal time for a system to stabilize after a change is considered to be three weeks.
• If you have been asked to get rid of some your responsibilities, find out the reason. Are you not good enough for it, or has somebody else has arrived who do the job better than you? In either case, do not blame the management.
• Finally, if you are not satisfied, leave with dignity. You don’t want people to curse you once you are gone. They should miss you.
• Keep in touch with your formal colleagues. Find out whether the change was successful in its objectives or not. This information may help you in case your current organization is planning the same change.

Remember, once you are through the initial tough period, most likely you will love the change.

Managing Change in Workplace #2

Imparting a change in an organization is never easy as it seems. Many of us don't realize the concerns that the employees have when the change process is on roll. Since many employees do not know what is going to come, their first instinct is to resist. They believe that the management is bringing about the change to impose its authority on them, and nobody likes to be forced. Then how to make a smooth transition? Following steps can be very helpful.

• Communicate in advance about the change to everybody, whether he or she is affected by it or not. This imparts a feeling of 'not being left-out' regarding latest developments in the company.
• Inform as to why the change is necessary in the organization, and what are the objectives that are to be achieved.
• Be open to the ideas from the employees. Who knows, some of them may have a simple idea to achieve your objective that may save a lot of energy & effort of yours.
• Ask the employees as to what is the best point of time to bring about the change. Let them set the date, so that they too feel that they too are involved in taking in such important decisions.
• Be first to accept the change.( For example, if you are planning to migrate your OS from Windows to Linux, you be the first to use it.) This will help you understand the problems that others might face once they accept the change.
• Reward those few who champion to accept the change before other employees.
• Analyze whether the change has achieved its objectives or not. If it is successful, announce this news, and give credit to all the employees. Praise the first champions.
• If the change is not successful, ask the employees as to what can be done to make it successful. Their ideas may be useful. (If no idea comes from anybody, it can be a major indication that people have not accepted the change whole-heartedly)
• Last, but very important. If required, roll back the change. You may consider it as your personal failure, but people will feel that you do care for them. They may even appreciate you for doing that, because in the end you are making their life comfortable.

Some more on change in my next post.

Managing Change in Workplace #1

As a rule, people hate change. Ask any person as to how will he react to a major change that is about to take place in his workplace. Most probably you will get a negative answer. All of us love to continue to live in our comfort zones. Nobody wants to take a risk to face the unknown. Then how do we bring about a change in the organization that is accepted by everybody?

Ask the following questions before bringing about the change:

• Is it really necessary?
• How many people are going to be affected by it? Can this number be reduced?
• Are those who are affected happy with the change? What is their opinion?
• What reward will the given to those who embrace the change first?
• Are the people able to see the benefits that they will reap once they accept the change?
• How do the people who are not affected by the change feel about it? Will they like to become a part of it if given a chance?
• Most important, do the others know how will you be affected by the change?

Once you have the answers to the above questions, plan the change. It is always better to bring about the change in phases rather than all of a sudden. This will help the employees to prepare themselves mentally for that unknown.

More on this in next post.

Understanding the Customers' Requirements

Yesterday I decided to have my dinner at my home rather than at the restaurant. So I ordered for a parcel. The dish which I ordered has an ingredient that is sprinkled over the top after it is served. As my parcel was packed, the man behind the counter sprinkled the ingredient on the top of the dish and sealed the parcel. I did not see anything wrong in that until I reached home and opened the parcel. The parcel did not have a wide opening & I needed to invert the container to empty the food out into a plate. When I did so, the ingredient on the top went to the bottom of the dish. I could not enjoy the dish fully as the taste given by the ingredient was not present in the first few mouthfuls. Worse, it did not add any special taste at the end too.

Getting to know one's customer's requirements is very important. In addition, we need to know whether the processes that we follow to fulfill those requirements are appropriate or not. Sometimes tweaking the process will enhance the users' experience of using our product.

The serving guy could have well put the ingredient at the bottom of the parcel. :-)

Impart Pleasent Feelings

We have a small-board in our office on which an inspiring quote is written daily. Yesterday the following quote caught my attention:

People may not remember what you did to them, or even say to them. But they always remember how you made them feel.

Our actions play an important part as to how others will retain information about us in their subconscious mind. We may do anything, but what is important are the thoughts in their mind that are triggered by our actions. If the thoughts are positive, people will come back to us. If they are negative, we can be sure that people will not be interested in interacting with us again. Then we know that we have to improve.

Let's make others feel better...

Welcome to this New URL

I welcome you all to this new URL of my blog. I know it is bit inconvinience for you to replace this url with the old one in your bookmarks. As I have put in my last post, I would like the url to convey what the blog is all about. Happy reading...

Can We Care For Strangers?

How often do we care for others? We all care for our friends, family, relatives etc. But do we care for strangers whom we meet on the road, in local train, or inside a mall? We can win hearts of people whom we have not even met if we care for them. Don't believe it? Read on. This is a true incident.

My colleague Vivek was working in Delhi earlier. He received a phone call from a bank whether he was interested in their credit-card. He told the caller (a girl) politely that he already had one, and was satisfied with it. After few days, the call was repeated, informing him that the credit-card on offer had new features, and he can try it. He again told politely that he did not want the card.

Few days later the same girl called up. She again asked him whether he was considering trying their new card. This time her voice was a bit husky. He again declined the offer, but asked her whether she was suffering from cold. She acknowledged that she did, and then she broke-down on the phone! She told that for the first time a customer had been so polite to her, and she was indeed shedding tears of joy, realizing that somebody (apart from her family) did care for her.

Can we not care for strangers…..?

Similar Post: I Hesitated To Care

Don't Lose Your Strengths

My colleague Senthil Raja sent me the following story

Once a princess went to the forest for an excursion. A tiger saw her & fell in love. He went near her. The princess got scared & started shivering because of fear. The tiger said, "Don't worry. I will not harm you. In fact, you are so lovely that I am in love with you. Will you marry me?"

The princess said, "How can I marry you? You are so fierce. I am scared of your nails & teeth". The tiger thought for a while and said, "Don’t worry dear princess. For your sake, I will break my sharp teeth and cut-off my nails. Now will you marry me?"

The princess said, "If you will cut your nails, and break your teeth, then how will you protect me from other animals? Sorry, I can't marry you."

The moral of the story: Do not lose your strengths for sake of love. Because people love you for your strengths.

The Handicapped Son

What do we feel when we a person on the road, who is disabled in some way? Do we avert our gaze and look somewhere else? When such a person approaches us for some help (not begging for money), do we really try to help him as we will do to a normal person? Do we actually treat them as NORMAL person?

We may not be able to help such people always, but let us make a point to thank God for the ability he has given us, that we take so much for granted. Below is an incidence that I received in email from a friend, which gives us something to think about.

The telephone rang. As he picked up, and heard the voice across the line, it was a big relief. He told his wife too, and she lifted her hands up to praise the heaven. The phone was from their son who had been on the battle-field for quite sometime now. It has been more than 15 days since they heard anything from him. And now he had called.

"I am fine dad. The war has come to an end, finally. I will be back in a week."

"Very good son. We were worried about you a lot. You should have called earlier. Anyway, now you are back, no problem. We are eager to see you."

"Dad, I want to ask you something."

"Yes son…?"

"Dad, one of my friends has been wounded in the battlefield. He has lost his one arm and one leg. I want to bring him home."

"Yes son, why not. He can stay with us for few days."

"No dad. I want him to stay with us from now on. He does not have any other place to go."

"But son.. I mean he can't stay with us forever, can he? Such a handicapped person will become a burden to all of us."

"But dad, he does not have anybody else in the world…!"

"Its ok son. You do not have to worry about others. He will find some way to lead his life. Do one thing. You come off here & leave that guy there. We can then discuss about him later at our leisure."

"But dad…"

"Try to understand my dear. We cannot take responsibility for every handicap in this world. You have your own life to take care. Leave him and come here. I assure you that.." and he heard the telephone click at the other end.

One week later they received the news that their son had died at the nearest army headquarter. Full of grief, they went to see his dead-body. The doctor present there told them that it was a case of suicide. He had consumed poison in the night, and was found dead in his bed next morning. But when they finally saw him, it came as a shock to them. He did not have his left arm, and left leg….

Previous post on similar topic: Is He Handicapped?.....No.

Friendship & Principles

Ever wondered about it? Which is more important for us? I believe that a relationship can be sacrificed in order to keep up one's own principles. Some time ago, I came across the following, & now I am wondering whether my thinking is right. Akhil & Arjun were very good friends in the school. Arjun's mother had died a few years ago. His father gave him money for lunch, and he was free to eat anything he wished. But he longed for the food that his mother used to prepare for him.

Akhil struck a deal with Arjun. Both started sharing their lunch with each other. Thus, where on one hand, Akhil could enjoy the food-stuff from the vendor outside the school-campus, Arjun was happy to munch the home-made food. None of them ever took each others lunch, without offering a theirs to the other .

One day Akhil dropped his pen. It no more wrote smoothly, & he had hard time to write the notes in the class as the teacher dictated. He complained this to his parents, but they won’t listen. Akhil told Arjun, “I wish I had a new pen”. Next day Arjun bought a new pen for Akhil. Akhil wished to pay for the pen. Arjun told that it was just a gift, and Akhil need not pay. The argument continued, and finally huge proportion. Both felt that they have been eating each others lunch but did not pay back enough to compensate for it.

Finally, as no settlement was reached, they decided not to share their lunch any more. Thus, both lost something which they used to enjoy.

I still wonder, what is the place for principles in ones' life. How should we balance these two parameters. I have seen a lot of instances where two friends go for lunch, one pays the entire bill, & the other friend keeps this in mind. On next ocassion, the other individual pays. It is assumed that both have paid each other, irrespective of the bill-amount which may be higher in one place. But nobody minds.

Let's realze that a true friendship is something that is not available in market. And one pays much more than money can buy. Do we remember how our friend took pains to buy a small birthday gift for us? The time he would have spent, the questions he would have asked himself as to what will suit you, what do you require most, what he can buy within his budget, that will be most useful to you, etc?

If you don't think that your friend has not done all this, then you may not have a friend. And the only way to have a friend is to be one....

Mini-saga: A Lesson in Just 50 Words

Ever heard the term 'Mini-saga'? It is a story that is written in exactly 50 words; neither 49 nor 51. I came across the term while reading one of my favorite blogs: Life Beyond Code. We all know that each story has a lesson to be learnt. It is a smart idea to put a lesson in just 50 words. I too got inspired and wrote a mini-saga of my own. It goes as follows:

Fear

It was getting dark. She walked faster. The street was not safe. Two men were walking behind her talking casually. Scared, she prayed to God & turned back, only to see them disappearing into a lane. Now she was alone on the road. The feeling of being alone was more fearful.

I hope it conveys the message. Another very good mini-saga, which I am borrowing from Rajesh's blog is as follows:

John loved the library. That day, he was engrossed in a book. He hopedto finish reading it completely. It was almost the end and then… therewas a surprise – the last section was missing. "Alas" John thought"this book is close to real life. You don't know happens next…"

In case you have a mini-saga of yours, kindly mail it to me, or post it here as a comment.

I Hesitated to Care

It has been raining in Bangalore for the last one week or so. The day starts with a bright sun, a hot noon, and then around 4pm, clouds gather in the sky. It starts drizzling around 6pm and sometimes rains heavily till late in the night. This causes problem for the people who travel on two-wheeler. They have to not only brave the rain but also flooded roads that are full of pot-holes.

One of my colleague, Senthil is just one of them. He comes to office on his Bajaj Discover. Due to rain he has been getting wet daily while going home. In addition, he had been forgetting to get his rain-jacket from home. On two occassions, he told me about this forgetfulness of his.

Next day while I was getting ready to come to office, I just remembered Senthil. It just occurred to me that I can call him at the moment and remind him about bringing his jacket to office. But I also thought that today he himself will remember to bring his jacket. And calling him will cost me Rs 1.20. So why bother? Just then, I remembered a quote that I had read on a blog: "If you care, people notice".

It stuck me at once. And next moment I sent a message from my mobile (which costs Re 0.70) to Senthil that he should not forget his jacket. What happened next was unexpected. Senthil called me up just to convey his thanks for reminding him.

I realized that even though I had hesitated to 'care' for him, he had not hesitated to 'care' for me. It was a lesson. He could have as well thanked me after coming to the office. But he chose not to delay it. The call costed him Re 1.00. But he did not think about it at all. It is a lesson for me about caring towards others.

It did not rain that evening.

Helpful Ones..

Last Saturday I had to attend a CSR (Corporate Social Responsibility) event organized by our Company. As planned, all of us assembled in our office premises at the scheduled time. We had booked cabs to take all the employees to the orphanage where we were to spend time with the children there. It so happened that all the cabs were full, & I was to go on a two-wheeler with one of my colleague.

When we both started, all the cabs had already left, and they were much ahead of us. Neither me, nor my colleague knew how to reach our destination. I had the address of on a piece of paper. Like in any metro, Bangalore auto-rickshaw drivers are supposed to be well-versed with the city areas. So both of us decided to ask these people for the directions to reach our destination.

We crossed roads, circles, by-lanes, commercial-streets, and by-&-by reached the area where the orphanage was located. Throughout, the 45 minutes journey, we approached more nearly a dozen auto-rickshaw drivers, and all of them were always eager to help us. One even climbed out of his auto to ensure that we took the right turn at the end of the lane, as far as he could see us.

It was a nice experience to see that the auto-rickshaw drivers who are considered to be a harsh community helped us, sometimes with a smile. None of them was harsh or shouted as us, whether it was a traffic jam, or a run-way.

Both of us, me & my colleague, lost our way at the end. It took us half-an hour to cover the last one kilometer of our way. All because we could not find any auto-driver to show us the way further.

Is He Handicapped?.....No.

As I have no cooking facility in my house, I depend upon the restaurants near my residence & office for my meals. In Bangalore, some of the restaurants have a typical way of operating. I don’t know whether it is same in other metropolitan cities in India. The customer has to first go to the payment-counter, pay the money for the item desired, take the token from the cashier, produce the token before the service-counter, and then wait at the counter to be served.

Last Sunday I had gone for breakfast to one such restaurant. As I waited for my turn to be served food, I noticed a handicapped person on the footpath just outside the restaurant. His legs were of no use, & he had to drag himself using his hands to move. He seemed to be a beggar looking forward to earn his daily bread. I watched him as he inched his way towards the people who were standing outside the eating area. They had either finished their breakfast or were deciding upon the menu. To my surprise, the beggar did not approach anybody. He seem to be waiting for something.

At that moment a two-wheeler arrived, carrying a person and two children. The beggar immediately went towards them. And instead of asking them to give something, he helped the children get down from the vehicle. The two kids seem to know him, as they smiled when they saw him. After the children were on their feet, their father spoke some words to this beggar. Even though I do not understand their language fully, I understood enough to make me feel proud of the beggar, or the person whom I assumed to be one. I realized that this person is a day-time care-taker for the children. His disability does not hamper him, and he is able to earn his living with dignity. It was a moment filled with joy for me to realize that we have one beggar less in our society.

I learned the lesson that it is our mind which hampers our progress & not our body. Had this person thought that he cannot earn his living once his legs were of no use, he would have been left to the mercy of others. But his confidence in himself, and his will-power had made him self-dependent.

My thought-process in this line was then disrupted as my breakfast was served by the man behind the counter...

Well Begun is Half-done

We have a weekly program in our office. It is named as Wissendock. “Wissen”, in German, means “Wisdom”. This program involves a series of lectures & team-activities, & is conducted voluntarily by employees of the company.

As a part of this program, our Business Development Manager, Vivek, was scheduled to give a talk on EQ. It was scheduled to start at 4pm. Around 3:55 pm we were told to settle down in the lecture-hall. We all move in, and Vivek came and took his place. He seemed to be prepared well for the talk. We all were sitting now, and still he seemed to be waiting for something to start.

Then suddenly he shouted at one of our co-workers present in the hall. “Why are you talking there? Do you think I am a fool standing here waiting to speak to you all? What do you think of yourself? Can’t you come and take your seat?”

The entire hall went silent at this burst–out from him. Nobody had expected Vivek to behave in such a manner. He is known to be one of the coolest guy around. The employee who was target of this burst, did not know what to do (he is junior to Vivek). He silently went and took his seat.

And then Vivek burst out laughing. He explained to us that what he did was just a demo of a person who has a low EQ than average……

Public speaking is an art. The speaker has to capture not only the attention of his audience, but also drive home the key-points of his topic to them. And when a speaker knows how to capture the attention of audience, his job is almost done. By starting in such a fashion, Vivek not only captured our attention, but also gave a demo as to what we would not do if we have a high EQ. It was a good beginning.

Not to forget to mention, the targeted person is a close friend of Vivek. Even as he was shocked from the out-burst, he knew in his heart that it was not to be taken seriously. Well done Vivek!

Everybody is a Role-Model

Have you heard this saying – “One should keep improving throughout one’s life”? Many a times we would have tried to put it into practice. We would have looked for role-models around ourselves to learn something from them. We might have searched for instances in their life so that we can learn a lesson that life is here to teach us.

Unfortunately, it is not that easy to find role-models. All the qualities that we admire are not found in a single person. On the other hand, many times we find people who are totally opposite. They have those qualities that are not worth emulating. And if we interact with such people quite often, this thought will come to our mind one time or the other, “Can’t these people see me & learn from me? Why can’t they take me as their role-model?”

Here I would like to quote from a mail that I got recently from my friend, Ramanathan. He has commented on this very subject. The excerpt is as follows:

“……be a keen observant of your surrounding and people for they are the best teachers. They teach in either way. One is either how to be or how to do or how to live and the other is either how not to be or how not to do or how not to live like them...... this is a part of life... I have personally gained a lot from such observation....”

Suffice to say, if we cannot learn what to become, we should at least learn what not to become. These people around us are also role-models. Only we need to learn from them in a bit different way.

Thank you Ramanathan……

Nip it in the Bud

Last week, my young cousin sister was getting ready to make chapattis for all of us. It was first time she was making chapattis. I was to supervise her. The task of making chapattis involves making dough out of wheat-flour, cutting it into small pieces, roll each piece into a flat pie-shape, and then bake it on the stove.

As she started making the dough, I stood by her side & watched her silently. After making the dough, she asked me whether it was rightly made. Unfortunately, it was not. The dough she made was quite hard. Even as I noticed the flaw, I told her to go ahead with rolling the chapattis. I thought that I should inform her of the mistake only after she finishes the chapattis.

The hard dough made it difficult to roll chapattis. It took almost double the time to roll out the required number. The shape also was not round but uneven. As the chapattis were put on the oven, they were getting stuck on the pan, & some even got burnt, unfit to eat. Finally I myself had to take out some more flour, make dough, & cook chapattis. The lunch was served one & a half hour late. All because of me as I did not correct my sister during the initial stage.

When we are asked to supervise somebody’s work, we should not let the person to carry on with flaws in the basic plan, thinking that the concerned person will learn from his mistake when he gets a final product, full of flaws. Then there is absolutely no need for our supervision.

As a guide / manager / supervisor, one’s job is to nip the flaw in the bud itself. Otherwise, the blame may as well come to us for not being attentive to our job…..

"What Is Spirituality"

Last week I faced a tricky question from my colleague. It was, “What is spirituality?” And even as I was preparing to answer, another question bamboozled me: “Is spirituality Mind?”

During my college years, I have heard enough on spirituality. We had had long discussions on the subject, which included hot debates & sometimes even classroom lectures. But this question did make me think.

‘Spiritual’ comes from ‘spirit’, which means something abstract. What is that abstract? It is the state of mind where one sees same energy flowing in everything around him. He believes that the same life-force runs through everyone of us. This knowledge penetrates into every aspect of his life, & he is no more worried about any untoward incident. He treats everything with equanimity. When such a state of mind is reached, life becomes a game. And one enjoys it. Nothing in life remains to be conquered.

Coming back to the situation, I was still pondering over the question. Then, one of my colleagues who had heard the questions put to me, replied to both of us, “What is not Spirituality?”

Blessing In Disguise

Last week it was the Birthday of one of my Senior Colleague. We all were set to have a grand lunch in a nearby restaurant, which he had agreed to sponsor. When the lunch-time came we all proceeded towards the decided venue.

Once we all were seated for lunch, I noticed that two members of the Board of Directors had joined us for the lunch. They had come for a meeting, and as it was their lunch-time too, they were invited to join us. This meant that our B'day pal will have to spend some more from his pocket than he would have planned initially. (I had no doubts that he can easily afford it.)

The lunch was in buffet fashion, & we enjoyed ourselves with the multitude of dishes. He was given a gift on behalf of the organization, and all of us sang the traditional B'day song. When it was all over, the bill came. And to surprise of all of us present there, one of the Board Member paid the entire bill, citing it as an additional B’day gift to our colleague.

Many times when we face a problem, we crib about it. We think why we are facing such a problem. What wrong have we done to anybody? We tend to forget that these very problems are the channels through which we utilize our hidden potential. We become stronger. We become tougher, and can face more difficult challenges. When we solve problems at our workplace, they become a reason for our promotion. When we solve problems in life, we overcome our weaknesses & stand tall above others.

One should remember that difficulties are blessings in disguise.... just like the Board Member who joined for the free lunch...........

Making The Right Choice

Recently I met one of our ex-colleague who had recently joined an MNC in Chennai. As we set down to have a meal, we started to ask her about her new job, workplace, colleagues etc. What she told is worth sharing.

Her new job was really exciting. She got a break in the area of her choice. Her salary was much more than she was getting in her last job. The distance between her office and her place of residence was also reduced, to just 15 minutes of walk. All this sounded very good to all of us & we really felt happy for her.

But then she told that she missed something in her new life. She said that she missed all the fun that we used to have. In her new workplace, where she had been working for one month now, she had no friends. She hardly had any rapo with anybody. Employees seem to concentrate only on their work. There is not much interaction between them. The employees who sit near-by her were all at least two years senior to her. They did not interact much with her, and she being new, also hesitated to mix with them. This was the case not only with her, but with the other newly-joined employees too. They were seated in the midst of senior employees, and faced this problem of not knowing anybody else than their respective reporting manager. Even during the lunch-time, our colleague had to eat alone, and go back to her desk to continue her work. What struck us most that this becomes a habit for the new employees too, so when they become a senior employee, they too don't interact much with the freshers.

Next time when you are planning to switch to a new job, think about it. What kind of workplace you prefer? Would you like a place where your colleagues know you, & spend time with you? Or would you prefer a corporate office where you do your job and your co-workers theirs? I don't deny the importance of a better financial prospective. And money is not everything in life.......

"This Is Team-work"

I would like to share something which stands out as a good example of what real teamwork is.
I was working on the database of the project (the same which occurred in my previous post). I was working on a trial version of Toad software, an SQL database tool. I had to type in same values in a particular column across multiple rows. To reduce my work, I just entered one word in each cell of the column.
Once I had completed the data entry, I wrote an SQL query to replace the word by the desired phrase. To my surprise, only one of the 18 cells was edited by the query. I tried again & nothing further happened. Confused, I called one of my senior to see into the problem. She has a very good hold on SQL queries. She typed in a complex query. And the result came. A result that none of us neither wanted, nor expected. All the cells in that particular column had changed to zero!!!
I know that the query that was given did not include anything like 'zero', ‘nil’, 'null' etc. But still both of us were staring at the screen bewildered.
Though I had a backup of the data, but copying from the backup to this database will mean that whatever I had done for the last 4 hours will be lost.
As I prepared myself to copy from the backup, my QA team-mate Sowmya Ambiti came to see what has been happening. When I explained the problem, she smiled, told me to relax and take a 30 minutes break. She took upon restoring the data to herself, even without my asking. She copied the data from the backup, in such a smart way that the data loss was minimal. I had not lost entire 4 hours work, but only what I could redo in a few minutes.
Sowmya denied acknowledging any praise for the work that she did. She just told me, “This is team-work”. I had no words to express my feelings…….

Not Much Workload....?

A comment from my boss on last Friday made me think.

I was sitting in my chair, working on my system. That day I had to grab some data directly from the internet, and put it in the project database. Now there was something wrong with the internet line and it was very slow. I had to wait for 1 minute to open a normal html page. Sometimes, even more... As my work fully depended on the net, I had nothing to do but watch the progress of the web-page loading on my screen. To remove the boredom, I had plugged in my earphones, listening to soft, instrumentsl music. At that time, my boss passed behind me. He saw me ..sitting idle in the chair, hands away from the keyboard and mouse, simply staring on the monitor, with earphones in my ears. In a juvial tone, he said to one of my colleagues, "Looks like Prashant does not have much workload..." I looked back at him ( I could hear what he said even with earphones plugged in ), and smiled. I protested too, in a friendly manner, and he walked away, smiling.

Then I started thinking about it. I have enough work. Just because I don't frown, complain to anybody, scratch my head, does that mean I have les work load than others? Or do I take it as a compliment, that inspite of the workload, I still remain cool & comfortable, not showing any kind of stress. ( On an average, I spend 11 hours in the office daily, for 5 days, and few more hours on Saturdays, for which we do not get any extra compensation).

Should I not listen to music when the work is dragging & the network is down? Should I complain to everybody regarding the workload that I have inspite of knowing that they work for same time duration in the week? Should I pretend to be stressed out even though I am not? Or should I continue... my way.....till they realise....

Did You Give Something

As one travels from one part of Bangalore to another, he can see the changes that have come over years. Once upon a time, Whitefield was considered to be outside the city. It was just 5 years ago. But now, a traffic jam in this area too is considered as normal. The same has been the state of many other parts in the city. Once considered as remote places, these areas are now attracting a lot of traffic, and hub-drub of the city.

And as you are stuck in a traffic-jam, you will definitely feel miserable. The noise around you, the pollution caused by the vehicles, the pot-holes, that you would have encountered on the way, & the ones that you will encounter on the way to your destination, all this will make you wonder as to what has happened to the city that is supposed to be the 'city of gardens'? Did you realize as to how many gardens did you actually see on your way?

What I find most disgusting is the state of the people in Bangalore; especially those who come here with the dream of earning their livlihood and leave the shadows of their cruel past behind.
One can see a lot of low-class workers, busy in thier daily-jobs, everywhere in the city. Be it a fly-over (something that has made a big hue-and-cry in the city), restaurant, railways, construction, you will find many people working here. They jostle into the BMTC buses, in the morning, carrying their lunch in a small tifin-box, and then busying themselves in the work that will provide them their daily bread.

But there is another class of people who cannot afford this. Let's go back to the traffic-jam where you are stuck. Did you notice somebody standing outside your car, extending his/her hand, expecting a coin from you? Or did you see a small girl, doing acrobatics on the footpath, so that her physically-disabled mother can get somethng from you? Or was it an old man who was trying to sell you a packet of ear-buds for a meagre 5 rupees, which will mean something to him, if not to you?

Did you give them something? A small coin, a packet of biscuits, a banana, or similar thing? Or did you ignore him and drove away once the signal turned green, like me?

My Journey To North India

Last month I had a chance to visit North India after a gap of two years. I was to attend my sister's wedding. It was 44 hours journey, including 40 hours by train, and 4 hours by bus, thereafter. As it was the month of February, I took enough warm cloths with me. I left Bangalore in only a T-shirt & was expecting a cold morning when I get down at Agra 2 days later. But it was not to be. I found myself sweating as I stepped out of the Agra Cantt. station, looking for an auto-rickshaw to take me to the nearest bus-stand. The journey from Agra to Etawah, my home-town was in a UPSRTC bus. There is a sharp contrast when you compare the bus to KSRTC buses. The bus was quite dirty. It looked like nobody has swept the floor for last one week. There were used water-bottles scattered around, along with groundnut peels. The bus was rickety and made a lot of noise. The journey was not that bad. After moving out of the city, the cool breeze took away my tiredness of the train journey, and I looked out of the bus window. This erupted nostalgic feeling in me. During my childhood I used to see the same scenery out there whenever I used to visit my paternal / maternal village. Those days I used to be very keen in traveling by train. Unfortunately, railway line was kilometers away from my village. I used to feel very sad about this. The last part of those journeys used to be terrible, as we used to travel in private buses, which will be overcrowded by default. Now, the same village was connected by a state highway, and better buses were available (even though I have not visited there for a decade now).

I reached my home in the afternoon. It was a different feeling. The place is a town, and the traffic is definitely different from the city of Bangalore. There is hardly noise and one can feel peaceful even on the road that leads to the railway-station. I had a quite, peaceful walk in the evening. I felt engrossed with peace.


Two days later, I had to get some material for the rituals that had to be performed for the marriage ceremony. I did not take the bike, as I prefer walking. It took me half-an hour to find the right shop. I told the shopkeeper man my requirements, and to my surprise, he gave me the material free of cost. He told that as the material is going to be used for the puja, I won't need a significant amount. And the meager amount that I needed can be given free of cost as it won't affect his business. I came back with the material without spending even a single rupee from my pocket. This was quite an opposite experience from the one I had in Bangalore a few weeks ago. I had shifted to a new house. I do not have any furniture, not even a chair. The house-owner noticed this, and he offered to give me a chair & a table. It was lying idle in his house. I thought that it will be good to have something like that, so I agreed. Immediately he told me the monthly charges that I will have to pay for the set.....!


The main ceremony was to be held in Patna. I went to Patna along with my family and relatives. It was another train journey of 9 hours. The weather was quite different from what I had expected. It was hot.! Thankfully we all were in AC coach.


As we all got down and reached the place where the ceremony was to take place, I realized my mistake of carrying all the warm cloths with me. There was no need for any of them. We were there for three days, and every night we used to switch on fan and sleep. Entire day the room AC had to be on. On the wedding day, I did not even put-on even once, the jacket that I had so lovingly bought in Bangalore to be wore during the ceremony. It would not have been out of place to have an ice-cream or a cool-drink. In fact, ice-cream was a part of the dessert served during the ceremony.....!


My sister went to her in-laws place, and I came back to my home town. It had become slightly hot, with mosquitoes now making there presence felt at night.


Soon it was time for me to leave. As I climbed back into the bus that will take me to Agra, I still thought of the weather, the mindset of the people, and my unused jacket......